Jagan Sacrafice
by illegiblewriter
Summary: (Hiei's sacrafice for Yukina) First, he was alone, then she came along, and he promised to always watch her. But he couldn't do it on his own, so he set out to find the Jagan eye so she would never be alone. *Poem opening* pls r/r!
1. Prologue

Jagan Sacrafice 

by. evilcarrot

**A/n: **The actual story will begin after this. Enjoy!

I watch as you play,

I watch as you sing,

I watch as you breathe,

            And as you look for me.

I can't let you see me,

I can't let you hear me,

I can't let you touch me,

            Or even let you know me.

You must grow-up,

You must learn,

You must live,

            And I cannot be apart of it.

You can't watch me,

            But I'll watch you.

You can't know me,

            But I'll know you.

You can't love me,

            But I'll love you.

Brother will love you,

Brother will keep you safe,

Brother will take care of you,

            And he'll always be sure to watch you,

Even if you can't watch him.

~/**(a.k.a.evilcarrot)O_-//~


	2. If He Was Me?

A/n: Hehe, short, but I love the cliffy, so you'll have to deal with it. Anyway, the next few _should _be _much _longer. Jagan Sacrifice 

            Cool wind whipped his cloak around while the stars twinkled brilliantly and illuminated the otherwise dark night. Beneath the only dark patch in the sky due to the rolling thunderheads above, Hiei sat coolly on a rock, contemplating what he should do next. _I never should have told her such a thing. Foolish, to make her suspect who I really am, to let on all I know. _ He nearly growled in frustration with himself. 

--

Earlier that night, Hiei had been in the kitchen, feeding off leftovers when Yukina had stepped in to clean the dishes. All the others were in the next room, joking and playing cards. Out of secret love for his sister, Hiei had volunteered to help, and even though she was shocked (she had seen him refuse to help Kuwabara the previous night) she covered it up and talked quietly with him. Listening to her, Hiei had almost dazed off, his sister's voice was a beautiful symphony of perfect notes strung magically together with lyrics that never quite fully mattered. It fully captured him, he didn't care what she was saying, just as long as she spoke with that beautiful voice. 

_"Hiei?" She called him out of his daze._

_"Yes?" He looked intently at her face, framed by blue strands of hair._

_"You looked like you were thinking of something,"_

_"No, nothing, just listening to you," He paused, something sentimental might sound odd, but never mind that, "You have wonderful voice, I was just listening to it,"_

_To his absolute pleasure she blushed and gave him a smile before mumbling a soft, "thank you."  Following that, Hiei had somehow been led to ask how long she had searched for her brother. There, in Hiei's mind, was the first mistake._

_"A few months now. I know it's not very long, but I had expected to make more headway than I have,"_

_"What do you know?"_

_"Nothing, there's not a trace of him. The only proof I have that he exists is my father's word." _

_"I hate to tell you Yukina, but I doubt he will let you know much more," Yukina looked up._

_"What do you mean 'let me'? Do you think he even knows that I exist?" _

_Silently cursing for his blunder, and a rare one, Hiei made up by insisting that he must, "I'm sure, what kind of brother would he be if he didn't know of his sister? I'm most certain that he's simply a scarred idiot." _

_Yukina smiled and gave a short laugh, " Everyone's a scarred idiot compared to you, Hiei!" He smirked in reply and set the final dish in the cupboard. _

_"Yes, they are," She gave another laugh and wiped her hands on a towel. Setting it aside and placing it in the drawer, Yukina leaned against the counter. She was staring at him with a puzzling look covering her face. Cocking her head, she spoke:_

_            "You sound like you know him."_

_            After that, he had been unable to entirely wave her suspicions aside and eventually gave in that he knew her brother, but did not know where he was or why he would not come forth. When Kuwabara came in ranting about how he was  missing Yukina and he wanted her to join him and the others in the other room. By the time she turned around to ask Hiei if he would come with her he had vanished outside and out of sight._

--

A graceful figure stepped into the starry light in front of him. A crack of lighting from the sheltering potential storm above revealed the hidden demon for a brief moment. Though brief, it was enough for Yukina to recognize him. 

            "Hiei, why are you hiding from me?" Her voice rang sweetly through his ears, _how do I escape this dreadful trap I've laid for myself?_

            "I'm not hiding," He spoke, "I just don't like being around those imbeciles for so long." He yanked his head towards the lighted window where Yusuke, Kuwabara and Botan were residing at the top of the block building. 

            "Oh, I just thought…"

            "Thought what?" _Hiei you fool! Don't ask! Let her give up! Don't encourage her to find out! _

            Yukina looked up, surely he knew, "thought about what you said in there, just before you left… about my brother." She looked hopefully at him.

            _Now you've gone and done it Hiei. _He continued his mental scolding of himself while the young Ice Princess awaited an answer. 

            "Hiei!" She cried urgently and finally caught his attention, "Please tell me!" 

            "Why do you want to know?"

            "Because! He's my brother! I have to know!"

            Hiei growled, "No you don't! What makes you think that there's not a reason he doesn't want you to know him?!"

            A silence reigned for a few minutes; Hiei's words hung in the air, slowly weighing down on Yukina until she felt she was suffocating from them. Not want to know him? She didn't want to believe that, she didn't want to believe that her brother might be ashamed of her. Near to tears, she struck forward with painful words: "Why? I- I haven't shamed him have I? What have I done? Whatever it is—! I'm sorry! I want to meet him, I want to know who he is!" 

            Hiei's heart was torn, _he,_ be ashamed of _her_? Never! Why couldn't she understand, that he wasn't the kind of brother she needed! "Yukina!" He stood from his rock but still hid in the shelter of the frightening clouds, the same clouds that continued to flash and crack through the conversation, this time shedding light on the small demon's enraged face. Yukina took a step back, the sudden move and tone of his voice had scarred her, but she remained close to hear him out. "Don't you understand?! It's him who is imperfect! Him who does not deserve you!" The begun to release from within the depths of his past and soul, Hiei continued to relate in furious detail why he could not tell her of her brother, " What would you do Yukina? What would you do if he weren't like you? If he was a thief?! If he was a murderer?! If he –"

            "I wouldn't care!" 

            The ranting halted. She wouldn't care? 

            "You don't know what you're saying," he calmly turned his back to her and retuned to his rock. Once he had sat back down, the clouds above started letting out their cold droplets. From where Hiei sensed Yukina standing a choking sob was heard. Soaking wet, the princess still found voice:

            "Is that it? You won't tell me because _you _simply deem it unjust for me to know him? Hiei! Please! If he were thief I would still love him! If he were a murderer I would still love him! If he was—"

            "Me?"

Thank Book Worm for this getting out so much sooner than I had expected!

~/**(a.k.a.evilcarrot)O_-//~


End file.
